3.5 months ago, my Dad died. And whether obvious or not, his passing & absence destroyed me. Since that day, I have employed every (mostly) non-destructive avoidance/coping mechanism possible. Numbing. Busyness. Disassociation etc. (I am nothing if not self-aware) 1/
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Whether right/wrong, I made a choice to delay processing his tragic death. I took personal inventory & I didn’t feel I had the bandwidth to address it in middle of an otherwise stressful/professionally demanding stretch. I promised myself it would be my top priority Jan ‘23. 2/
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So here we are. Today I have my first grief therapy session. I am sharing this bc I believe in accountability. I believe I am responsible for confronting the unhealed trauma that I carry & how it may affect my outlook on life & my relationships. 3/
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I also believe in authenticity. I don’t want to be a phony. I can’t be the lady on tv championing mental health awareness in sports (& elsewhere) then pretend I just miraculously recovered fr this terrible thing that happened to me & my family. It doesn’t work that way. 4/
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I also believe in therapy. Bc there is simply too much evidence not to. I want to be the best version of myself & am not above asking for help. I know therapy will help me heal. As will cont’d conversations about the reality of trauma/grief & how unchecked - it can cripple us. 5/
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I know we’ve been programmed to think it’s awkward & uncomfortable to talk about but I also know there are many of you carrying stuff like this around too. Consider this another invitation to talk about it. Or an invitation to listen if someone else wants to talk about it. 6/
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“Keep running from your pain and eventually your pain runs you.”
Miss you, Dad. ❤️
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@JenLada
Lost my mother 20years ago 2/19. It was/is the most destructive moment in my evolution(yep, it beats MS & cancer). 🤗❤️🤗❤️🤗
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@JenLada
I lost my 18-year-old nephew in September of 2021 and was much like you. I was destroyed and put things off. In January of 2022 had my first therapy session and it has been the best thing I have done. Best of luck to you during this journey.
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@JenLada
I truly appreciate you and your post. I lost my dad 2 months ago and can totally relate. My heart goes out to you.
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@JenLada
I lost my grandpa in 2020. It took him passing away to realize how fortunate I was to be 30 years old and still have my grandparents. But with that came immense sadness. It took an all out breakdown for me to enter therapy. Praying for you and your family!
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@JenLada
Lost my ma and dad in 2018 and my cousin /best friend from fucking covid in 2020. Don't know if I've ever really dealt with it. I'm definitely not the same person I used to be.
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@JenLada
Thank you for sharing your story. Like you, my father passed about 6 days after your dad. It's been a rough quiet ride these past few months. Your posts have opened my eyes a bit and I see a path forward. Thank you!
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